Friday, October 2, 2009

Joey "Cheater" Maracle vs. Shannon "Stalker" Maracle

This is awesome: When Shannon Maracle came home with her and Joey Maracle's first child, he was over at his mammy's with his other baby's mama and her baby and when Shannon had their second child, he was banging another tramp and their house .... and brought said hussy to pick Shannon up!
Oooh la la.
So, Joey laughs when Judge Lynn asks "Do you cheat on your wife at all?" He then added that "she lets me." As in, Shannon invites menages. She gave one for a Christmas gift, so sayeth Joey, who never got over finding an ovulation test almost immediately post-wedding.
"I'm all into fitness and health and looking good. I like to look good. I like to look at people who look good. I mean, that's what I do. For a living," notes Joey. "And she just let herself go."
When it was pointed out that "she got a boob job for you," Joey maintained that, "Yeah, she was supposed to lose weight after she got the boob job. I helped her get the boob job. Took care of her after she got the boob job. And, she never even lost weight. Donuts hid in cabinets. Snickers bars. Her whole car was full of McDonalds wrappers. Couldn't even get into it."
F'in A, Joey. I'm with you. If you pay for faux breasteses, you OWN the broad who's flaunting them.
But you lost me when you went to Myrtle Beach with another broad and, when Shannon filed for divorce, pulled the emotional-problems-I-need-institutionalization card. Well, she took him back. (Side note: It's the epitome of greed for said woman to want $450 for the wedding dress she says you cut under these circumstances.)
As for the stalking allegations, well, she'd go over to the club he bounced at to holler down the tramps that he hit on.
I think Judge Lynn said it best with, "So he can just roll around and have sex with other women as long as he mentally shows back up at your house, it was OK with you. Is that what I got?"
To which Shannon said, "Yes."
After which Her Honor turns to spraytan Joey and asks, "You couldn't find anything better to do than that?"
[If I may interject, um, is there anything better to do than that?]
Upon hearing which Joey goofy smiled and laughed again and said, "She would just always do that."
No, it doesn't make any sense, but did you expect these people to?
Noting that his open-spouse likes cutting people's tires, including his friend's mother's tires, and how she set his Myspace page to say he loves Richard Simmons -- which, mind you, is f'in hilarious -- Joey asks the question of the hour: "How's it cheatin' if she let me bring 'em home?"
Deep question, yo. I'll let you think on that for the weekend. I'm off to Atlantic City.