Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Tracey Dior vs. Kiva Dior


If I can't be honest with you, dear Divorce Court fans, who can I be honest with? Nobody, that's who. So it should go without saying that the only reason I'm taking the least bit of time to write this standard-seeming case up is simple: Tracey Dior is relatively attractive, in a pole-dancing kind of way. There's something about natural blondes. Ha, I know she's keeping Clorox in bid'ness, but still. She can spin round and round for dolla billz anyday.
I mean, it's kind of cool that her ladyboy husband is asking for $2,400 from hot chick for the therapy she's forced him into. He calls her a pathological liar and habitual cheater who dates his co-workers. She cops to cheating, but only after his errant ways landed sexy texts from other ladies -- on her phone! How's this for a noteworthy D.C. exchange:
Judge Toler: "You currently have a boyfriend, correct?"
Hot chick, with a saucy smirk: "No, I have a girlfriend."
Kiva: "That just looks like a boy."
Then, a picture of lady love was put up on the courtroom screen. I'll be honest: it could've been naughtier. But I digress.
He said he was in that marriage alone. I'd ask why he didn't spare no expense to bring her into the mix. Calling her gender-defying-lover "Frodo" probably didn't help, though. FWIW: Frodo called Kiva the "Predator" because of the spying from the bushes -- no pun intended. She even called his cellie one time and could hear the "Fergalicious" ringtone. Then, she proffered that her man-piece was actually gay because he liked strawberry daquiris. I don't know him, so I shan't pass judgement, but Fergalicious? "And I'm not the only one," said Tracey, who got a little less hot when she started bitching about jewelry and the lack of reception thereof.
"Well, he doesn't touch me. And I lost, I used to weigh 290 pounds, I lost 152 pounds and he stopped being attracted to me," she points out.
Whoa! I think we can end it there. She seems pretty cold-hearted. Well, as cold-hearted as a hot bisexual gal can be.

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