Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Ceasarae "Woo Woo" Smith vs. Jerussia "Overlordess" Smith
Back in college, someone told me the story about how they knew a nurse who told them that a baby left their nursery with a brand-spanking-new name that sounded like, "Fuh Mal Ay." It's because the parents saw the "Female" tag by their child and figured the hospital named them for you. Seriously.
Well, I thought of that as soon as the case of Ceasarae Smith vs. Jerussia Smith. I had to wonder whether Ceasarae was named after "Caesar," and Jerussia's parentals thought Jerusalem was a Moscow suburb, but things went awry at the naming ceremony. Things are still going wrong if you end up at Divorce Court though. Here's the breakdown:
-- Ceasarae says Jerussia's jealous and controlling, but that's just 'cause he cheated on her. He got caught because she hooked his cell phone bill up through her credit-card for monitoring purposes. She then found out that he bought another phone and hacked into it so she could check whether numbers showed up more than three times. He still went out with a gal who called 3+ times.
-- Ceasarae's very honest about his dalliances, though, and that's to be commended. He has a handkerchief to de-sweat his head. Even though, I can only assume Judge Lynn Toler keeps the room temp-controlled.
-- Jerussia worries that she's 14 years older than Ceasarae. Ceasarae, who was on probation at the time of wedded bliss, don't mind. But, he couldn't even wait two days to cheat. They were married a day. They soon had a chat, in which man told woman he wouldn't fight her divorce desires. They didn't split, though, and Ceasarae says he's lived under surveillance ever since. Probees notice these things. Fourteen-year elderladies just get mistaken for their boytoy's mammy.
-- Ceasarae admits that a lot of his boys are immature but that she "be over-reacting" when some lady bought him a drink one time.
-- Ceasarae says "Woo woo" a lot. I dig that.
-- Jerussia got a "Hey baby, what's good? Whatchu doing today?" text. Ceasarae thought "she was gettin some getback" so he called texter and let 'im rip.
-- Jerussia is suing for transitional support. But it seems to both me and Judge Lynn that this can all be worked out. Yes, Ceasarae has problems with Jerussia's control issues, but Jerussia is still interested in Ceasarae, who has to regain total trust. Seems that he has issues with the whole total openness thing, though. There's a chance they may be doing a follow-up appearance next season.
-- Judge Lynn digs that Jerussia got the young guy but laid down the law for ladyfolk: Let's start fighting with one another over the manfolk. Preach. On.
-- They ended with a hug after Ceasarae told Jerussia she "looked pretty."